HOT LESBIAN ACTION!!!

By some odd conflagration of events my parents took from the library a cinematic gem known as Spider-Man. This film can easily be distinguished from the far more recent Spider-Man 2 by the fact that this is the first in the series.

I've already seen it three times, so I'm not really learning anything new, but it's still an enjoyable viewing. I STILL don't think Tobey Maguire is a great Spider-Man. I mean, he's got nerdy down, he could play nerdy in his sleep. But there's way more to Spider-Man than thick glasses and a bad haircut. Despite his humble science-contest roots, Peter Parker is COOL. He's really cool! Just no one knows it. Yeah, I mean he's got the nerd thing, and the angst thing, but he's also really DOWN and WITH IT. Half of Spider-Man's personality is the smooth-talking wisecracking personality he throws in front of himself to deal with life's little problems, like things that explode at you. Tobey's Peter Parker is just such a wimp, I could hardly imagine him blocking all those punches with his face like that; that takes precision AND courage and I rarely even manage it. That's why Jake Gylenhaal should have played him; they're basically the same person but Jake is taller and he gets the whole sarcasm thing. Who has Tobey Maguire ever played? Shy, sincere everyman after shy, sincere everyman.

And Kirsten Dunst? You are not a natural redhead, and pretending to be just makes it worse. I mean, yeah, you're a pretty lady and all, but don't be Mary Jane. Let someone else be Mary Jane. I don't know who, but someone!

But otherwise, it's a good movie: it's got a well-conceived plot, great fight scenes, and there is that one scene where you can kind of see Kirsten Dunst's nipples.


Nicky

MY E-MAIL! Okayeahwhatever@yahoo.com.
AIM: Those eyes! Those terrible, yellow eyes!