HOT LESBIAN ACTION!!!

What is this shit? I'm watching "Last Comic Standing", and I'm like, "Come on: aren't you people supposed to be funny?" I mean their stand up bits can be good sometimes, fine. But I mean, aren't comedians supposed to be naturally funny? I'm not saying they always have to be on, but I sure haven't seen these people be funny as people instead of as comedians. It's all fucking drama when they're doing those in-front-of-the-camera things. "So and so is going down." Or when they're strategizing together. "If you want to take him down, you take out his people. Here's an old mafia trick: you kill his friends, his family. And he knows you're coming after him."

What kind of talk is that? That's not even civil. You do not compare voting someone off a TV show to mafia terror tactics. Or do you?

Oh man, I should be on this TV show. I would rock everyone's fucking universe. They'd be all like, "You're a dick!" except it would be bleeped so it sounded like "You're a d-BLEEP-ck" Because no one's gonna crack THAT code. Anyway, they'd call me a dick, I'd be like, "Oh yeah? You're a dickFORE!" And they'd be all, "What's a dickfore?" And I'd be like, "Oh! Fake you out fake you out! Where am I where am I? Where'm'I gonna be?" I'd be all motioning with my arms and shit, so they couldn't get a shot at my face. Chah chah! Zhip! Zhip!

And I would win their love.

Maybe my plan needs some work... or DOES it? That's why I'm so mysterious: statements that can mean two completely different things depending on whether or not I'm lying.

Nicky

Oh Tammy, you a bitch!

MY E-MAIL! Okayeahwhatever@yahoo.com
AIM: Jake Aimer